How to find a ring size without them knowing

Planning a surprise? Here are five discreet ways to get the size right — and the safest size to pick if you simply have to guess.

  1. Borrow a ring they already wear. Take a ring from the correct hand (rings are usually worn on the ring finger) while they’re not wearing it, and measure its inner diameter in millimetres.
  2. Trace the inside. If you can’t take the ring, trace around the inside on paper and measure the circle’s diameter, or press it into a bar of soap to capture the size.
  3. Compare to your own finger. Slide their ring onto your own finger and mark where it stops — then measure your finger at that mark later.
  4. Ask a friend or family member. Someone close may already know the size, or can casually ask. A sibling or best friend is your safest source.
  5. Choose a resizable style. When in doubt, buy a resizable ring near the average (US 6 for women, US 9 for men) and resize after the proposal.
Got a borrowed ring? Measure its inner diameter and convert it on the ring size converter, or read how to measure a ring accurately.

If you have to guess

The average is about US 6–6½ for women and US 9–10 for men — see the full average ring size data. Choose a resizable metal (gold, silver, platinum), and avoid full-eternity or tungsten styles that can’t be resized.

Frequently asked questions

How can I find out her ring size without her knowing?

Borrow a ring she wears on her ring finger and measure its inner diameter, or trace the inside on paper. You can also ask a close friend or family member, or slip her ring onto your own finger and mark where it stops. As a fallback, choose a resizable style near US 6.

What is the safest ring size to guess for a proposal?

US 6 to 6½ for women and US 9 to 10 for men are the most common sizes. Pick a resizable style and have it adjusted after the proposal if needed.

How do I measure a borrowed ring?

Measure the inner diameter across the middle in millimetres and match it on our chart, or use the converter’s “Diameter (mm)” option. Even a paper tracing of the inside works.